The Dream of the Nineties is Alive in Portland

Looking back through my pictures, I thought, "Look at these ritzy things I found in Portland." But then every third picture or so would actually be pretty weird.

Portland is trying to claim the saying "Keep Portland weird," but we all know that Austin, Texas has that riff on lockdown. I'm guessing that the real reason for this—besides, of course, the fact that I live closer to Austin than Portland and thus side with it because of ethnocentricity— is because Portland, unlike Austin, does not have to try at all to "stay weird."

So I coined the term "gritzy," which blends the words "grunge" and "ritzy." Because, in my short experience of Portland, that encompasses this wacky city. 

We'll work in chronological order. I arrived Friday evening, spent all day Saturday in the city, and left Sunday after church.

First. Friday evening, almost into town, I ran out of gas in the burbs (ghetto? unsure) of Portland, so I pulled off the highway and, would you believe it, right into the parking lot of a donut shop. Crazy how that happens! Everything about the situation recommended that I go inside and grab one—the name Heavenly Donuts reminded me of Birmingham, they were open even though it was dinner time, I conveniently forgot that I was already planning to eat a donut the next day, and the store looked lame and cheap (which we all know means perfect). And it didn't disappoint! The workers were friendly and helpful and I got this ugly and weird but delicious chocolate cinnamon roll, which true-to-form I gnawed the top off of because I am a five year old and only like frosting. Or because I am carb-conscious and therefore saved some lame calories by skipping the bready part, you decide. 

Second is this salad, which has so many chia seeds that it looks like it's covered in ants. I got it at Garden Bar, which is one of those places that makes super legit salads. & it was only $7! Ritzy for sure.

Next we have the compulsory daily dessert stop. Knowing that my sugar intake was going to be maxed out the next day by my donut pilgrimage, I decided that I *had* to try Portland's premiere ice cream stop the night I got there. See that scoop of ice cream? I waited for it for fiFtY miNuTeS. Fifty! Das a long time.

It's from Salt and Straw, which is one of those places like Jeni's or Big Spoon where you can tell they like their ice cream even more than you do. It was worth the long wait for the experience, but I didn't die over the ice cream. Maybe it's because I have Jeni's and Big Spoon so close to home, so I don't need all the fancy Portland fuss. Stop three? Ritzy, duh.

So I went back to the hotel, and exercised, and talked to Lyd, and set my alarm for 6:30 so I could be at Blue Star donuts when they opened. (How Portland-y is it for a donut shop to open at seven? As if even the people who wake up really early for work don't have to be there till after 7.)

After spending a half hour writing about my Saturday morning trips to the donut shops and still not finishing my commentary, I decided that, as was usual in the Charlie Lovelace-era of this blog, the donut trips would need their own post. So check back for that later!

Next was my morning coffee shop trip, where this microscopic cup o' joe (can you even see it?) was considered a "small." And cost $4. And wasn't what I ordered. (And I was a pushover and didn't ask them to correct it.) 

Not only was the coffee spazzy (excuse, me, "ritzy"), but they were doing some casual Japanese ice sculpting in the back corner. Huge knife, huge block of ice, lots of drama. Note the product of these labors in my coffee drink in the picture above! Square ice cubes. "Why yes, thank you, nothing less would do."

After spending a few hours writing, I kept exploring the city. In the interests of keeping the blog post moving along quickly, we'll go into a speed round of "ritzy or grunge."

Blank wall at Powell's City of Books with the imperative "Please don't touch the art." /// grunge

This beautiful store? I mean please the dressing rooms are covered in plants and the clothes are arranged by color. /// ritzy

Food stalls surrounding parking lots? I got Thai for $7. It was delicious. /// grunge

The second coffee shop of the day, with this "drinking chocolate" served so beautifully? /// ritzy

This human on a golden-decked bike with tie-dye and a unicorn hat? /// grunge

There you have it, folks! Grunge, and ritzy, and tons of fun. 

Keep Portland Gritzy.

Stay tuned for news of my sweet, sweet time with Anne in Sisters, my trip to Portland's top donut shops, and my break in Seattle with *the* Taylor-Marie + also amazing human Scott Smith. & keep sharing my blog with ppl if you like it—that helps more than you know!